After all that agony of befriending the database, it looks as though it will be unneccessary. Yes, gentle reader; for the nth time my company has pulled the rug out from under our feet, cancelling a project we had already begun to implement. A very sad time is had by all, especially those who (unlike me) had actually written code. My struggles in the database which kept me from coding I see now in a different light, the gentle intervention of fate to keep me from doing work which would be consigned to a trash heap. How kind the universe is!

Does anyone actually believe these strange and wondrous things I write?

I think the answer to all my pondering is what I wrote on the front page; this is a journal, but it is not a depiction of reality. It does not try to reflect my life accurately. It is a journal of where my mind wanders, which makes it a nice blend of fantasy and fact, and if someone takes from my last entry that I don't trust my friends (as I keep fearing they will), then clearly they are confusing the fantasy with the fact. It might happen, it probably will happen, and by warning of what I am doing I am doing all I can to avoid it. After this it is out of my hands.

Which may be unfair, to throw words out and claim no responsibility for them... but how many times do I need to say that this is just what I want to write and not necessarily Reality? I'm not going to say that it isn't true, because frankly that's a philisophical question I can't even begin to get into, but true or not, I am not trying to reflect reality accurately here, merely to do what I wish to do.

The only Reality here is that I am not trying to reflect reality accurately. Which may end up with more realness and truth that I or anyone else is comfortable with, and wouldn't that be charming?